As a Delhi blogger who had this noble thought to invest his hard earned money to buy CWG 2010 tickets on the first day itself, ‘disappointed’ is what I feel now. However, today when you read my write-up, intend is to make you happy; not disappointed.We have to go back to the important year of 2003, when India was selected to play the host for 2010 edition of Commonwealth Games. India (the land of non-violence) silently paid an acceptable ‘wealth’ to all commonwealth nations to come here and participate. Under the leadership and guidance of our honourable ‘much’ respectable Suresh Kalmadi, CWG 2010 was allotted to India and from then onwards, it was Suresh Kalmadi’s baby.
The Indian government saw the navigating capabilities in the wings of pilot Kalmadi and formed an OC (organizing committee) to oversee growth of Kalmadi’s baby (i.e. CWG 2010 games). Kalmadi’s foreign aids were two expensive imported Mikes (Mike Hooper and Mike Fenell). Days went pass. Years went pass. The Indian government forgot about the games. But then came...the Indian media
The Indian media ran a reality check and in process discovered nothing but what was obvious – corruption in OC. CWG mess got the 9 PM slot of news channels thanks to numerous financial frauds investigations and Bang Boom Blast happened in OC. The useful abbreviations (CVC, CBI, ED, PMO, etc) came into scene for a few days but still Kalmadi assured the world that his baby is getting healthier day by day. God heard this lie and directed the rain Gods to give Delhi an over flowing Yamunaji (can you believe that!). Heavy rains collapsed all plans of juggad work for Games and since then the baby is transferred to Cabinet Secretary, Delhi CM, and Minister of Urban Development with Prime Minister of the nation watching its growth (indeed a lucky baby).
Lately there are more negatives attached to these games than positives, but I hope you aren’t feeling disappointed. So what if ‘salt packet sized’ countries like New Zealand, Whales and Scotland pokes you with their hygiene standards and then without any justification complains about dogs using beds and paan stains and dangerous sockets and filth and dengue and security. Man! this complaining is so very imperialistic…so very uncool!! Surely Birmingham is behind this (let special branch of Delhi Police investigate this and submit a report).
And by the way, why are these countries cribbing at all. Haven’t they researched that paan is a flavour of perfume (also condom nowdays). It erases your stress, especially after that lane-designed traffic mess. Somebody please tell them that the strains were to ‘globalify’ paan (one of the cheapest food items which can be quite handy during the times of recession in commonwealth).
And hey, how dare do they complain about dogs using beds. If athletes who run 100 metres deserve a lavish sleep; have a heart for these dogs that run miles on Delhi pot-roads. Animal lovers? PETA? Where are you?
About the more serious security issue. As an Indian I can assure you about foolproof security. Infact you will most probably be getting an individual army soldier as he is now abundant. He is now even making pedestrian bridges for us; a fine example of building the nation (saving the country as usual).
Then there is another very amusing story. South Africa ambassador to India finds a snake! Isn’t South Africans known to love wildlife? Why can’t he arrange a visa for that poor lean flexible specie and rehabilitate him in South Africa? Afterall Delhi is on a mass cleaning mission (say no to authorised species be it snakes or monkeys or migrants).
Oh! I forgot to tell you about my hygiene standards. They are surely different from that of Lalit Bhanot. You see we are diverse in India and we are diverse in everything.
And how can we miss out on our sports minister; CWG is a shaadi for him. For many b-school students, CWG mess is now a case study and a prime example of ‘juggad-theory’ failure. It seems that the preparation of CWG resembles the last minute preparations by a student before his exam. In reality the student might pass but the probability that he will top this way is rationally low.
Lastly, you must be asking what about CWG 2010’s mascot Shera (my friend). I met him yesterday and he told my disappointed soul something by which he is still bearing a smile. As Shera says “bade bade desho mein aisi choti choti baatein hoti rehti hai”.
Just a second, somebody is there at the door. Oh! It’s the private courier wala with my commonwealth tickets for opening ceremony. See you there and hey! Do spot me in that 40-50 crore Helium balloon.
ps: apologies for not mentioning about athletes. Hope you are not disappointed (and if incase you are, try making a Jaane Bhi Do Yaroon, afterall you won’t get a better opportunity)
SPEAKing PICtures will be back with the review of the opening ceremony of Commonwealth Games 2010.
Till then LET US ALL SUPPORT THESE GAMES.
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